The Pink Spoon

Tyler is a funny little dude. Ever since he learned to react to us, the word “spoon” has made him belly laugh.

As has the word “beets”… so odd.

Moving right along!

In the last month I have noticed, with 100% accuracy, that every single time Tyler is in the tub after dinner the FIRST thing he does is grab his pink spoon. He has dozens of bath toys, but the pink spoon reigns supreme.

Tonight I asked myself why this is something I have noticed and become facinated with? Would I be as fixated on his choice if he grabbed his Batman rubber ducky or Oball submarine? I guess I am trying to recognize some internal bias on my part that has drawn my attention to the significance of the pink spoon.

Before Tyler was born, but after we found out we were having a boy, I was DETERMINED to raise him as gender neutral. I wasn’t going to make a big “thing” of it, but I wanted my child to exist on the gender spectrum according to where he was most comfortable. I still want this for him, but over time his wardrobe has grown with sports themed items and shirts that read “hunk” and “future ladies man” and my energy has been so limited the past year that this was a battle that fell to the wayside.

Admittedly, I didn’t really think much of my gender neutral parenting choice again until this preoccupation with the pink spoon came about. I realized I started projecting these predominantly society driven ideas onto my son.

Starting today I am recommitting myself to creating a safe space free of expectation for my child. Tyler is who he is, I will continue to love and learn and embrace whoever he evolves into. The pink spoon means nothing.

In the immortal words of Keanu Reeves “there is no spoon…”


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